The Secret to Good Grades

 

In the mid '80s, I was working towards a college degree in engineering. Back then, institutions were unconcerned if students were under a lot of stress. In fact, they took it upon themselves to burden us with a substantial academic workload in attempts to wash us out. This was before anti-bullying agendas or any focus on self-esteem building. I just finished high school where I was pantsed in gym class for four years by jocks, only to find myself accepted into an educational program designed to actively weed out the weak. It all started when I was a sophomore in high school. A long haired punk who played guitar, poorly, in a rock band, I did just enough school work to get by, then I signed up for physics.

Throughout the summer, the prospects of taking a tough science class unnerved me. I quit music, cut my hair then embarked upon my junior year with the intention of applying myself academically. My efforts paid off. I got a perfect score in physics and later in calculus. Along the way, I developed a system to attain stellar grades which carried me through high school where I ended up graduating sixth overall. Modifying my technique for college, I managed to obtain a 3.79 GPA as an undergrad. Later, I earned a masters in engineering at another institution where my system brought me a 3.9 GPA. In the mid '90s, after a little tweaking, I earned a masters in computer science with a 4.0 GPA. Over my many years of academic toil, I've tutored students in math and science, who after embracing my approach, enjoyed a significant improvement in grades.

Proper Textbook

A good text is written for the student, not the author. It's full of clear, concise explanations with illustrations, sample problems, and answers to the odd numbered problems in the back. The book should be no smaller than six by nine inches. A diminutive book appeals to eggheads because they like to think it's packed with important, cranial information that few understand. The choice of textbook tells you something about the teacher. If they like small books devoid of diagrams and annotated with cumbersome notation, then the teacher sees themselves as an intellectual and will likely make the class unnecessarily difficult. What you want to look for is an instructor who enjoys the subject material as well as teaching. The physical characteristics of the textbook is a measure of the pompousness of the instructor.

Bill Nye,
The Bow Tie Guy

Avoid Bow Ties and Scarfs

If a teacher uses a picture of themselves on the faculty webpage wearing a bow tie or a scarf, don't take their class. Like a small textbook, these accessories are a sign of pretentiousness. Professor Lambeau in Good Will Hunting wore a scarf. Teachers who are more interested in their intellectual status among their peers will likely make their class difficult by delivering obtuse lectures, assign unrelated, burdensome homework, and create unfair exams. If the instructor shows up wearing an ascot, drop the class immediately. When the text is good and the class notes closely follow the book, then it's possible to overcome a crappy teacher if you...

Read the Text

If the book is readable, then read it. When you're assigned a set of problems at the end of the chapter, don't approach the task with the attitude that you want to finish the homework as soon as possible. Digest the literature first, and do so before the lecture. This is perhaps the most valuable technique I proffer and is the least likely to be followed. Most students never crack the binding of their textbooks even after spending hundreds of dollars. By reading the lecture material before class, you have the opportunity to ask sophisticated questions in class. Rather than spending a lot of time trying to track down a professor or graduate student during their office hours, hit them up with important questions in class. You can do this most effectively by reading ahead. Doing so also makes you look like you're super smart by asking hardcore questions on material that everyone including the teacher thinks you just absorbed.

Ask Questions During Office Hours

Along with class participation, always go see the instructor during their office hours, even if you don't need any help. Think up a question, either from the lecture or the homework, that you can ask your teacher during their office hours. This is especially important as an undergrad in a large class. Always ensure that you are not a nameless face in the crowd. Eventually, teachers will know you by your first name. They will remember you because they love to talk about their topics of study and will embrace anyone who asks them about their research. I often solicited help from my professors on problems that weren't assigned as homework. After arriving at the solution, they usually questioned if the problem was in the homework set. I would explain that I was just interested in the problem which always made their faces light up.

Don't Form a Study Group in a Class That's Curved

To get a good grade in a class, you need to do well when everyone else does poorly. I never held a study session when the teacher stated that grades would be curved. Whenever I took a class, I considered myself in direct competition with everyone in the room. The only exception was when I took computer science classes with my wife, Christine. One time, a teacher thought we had an unfair advantage being married so he had the class vote on whether we could be on the same team. Most of the students thought the guy was nuts and approved our academic coupling. I think he was going through a divorce.

Take Any Advantage

I was always on the lookout for opportunities up to but excluding cheating. Back before the internet, the best source for a topic of study was Schaum's outlines. Often lazy teachers would pick test questions straight out of Schaum's. Once a friend told me that a teacher announced there were three bonus questions on his math exam, one for undergrads, another for masters, and a third for the PhD, which was him. My friend recognized that all of them came right out of a Schaum's outline. Since it was an open book test, he penned his answers directly from the manual. Once, I ran out of time on a math exam so I chicken scratched a load of gibberish on the last problem then wrote "x = 1" and circled it. Turned out that was the answer. The grad student, whipping through the tests as he corrected, gave me full credit. Today, lazy teachers sometimes copy homework problems directly from the internet. Once you find the source, you can often discover the solution as well.

Always Be Respectful

I taught masters level computer science classes in the '90s. I was always amazed at how rude students were to teachers when they felt they were marked erroneously. Once after my father had unexpectedly passed away, a student approached me holding his test aloft. He said,

"I'm sorry your father died, but why did you mark this off?"

When you're trying to get something out of a teacher, being an ass hat even when you're sure you're right is often counterproductive. Whenever I thought something I did was incorrectly graded, I always asked the teacher to help me understand where I went wrong. Often they discovered their mistake and corrected it themselves. You never know. You might just be wrong so don't be a dickhead when confronting your teacher.

Rate Your Teachers

If you do have a bad experience with a shithead instructor, then go to Rate My Teachers and warn others. I've written extensive reviews of crap teachers which sometimes led to no one signing up for their class the following semester. Having to absorb that zero students want to listen to them is an intellectual slap in the brain bag for an egghead. You should also pen positive words of encouragement concerning good teachers as well. In my early days in academia, there wasn't any websites that afforded an anonymous summary of teacher's performances. Today, there are many review sites that help you get the word out. Writing a review of your teacher won't specifically get you a better grade unless students en masse elect to report their experiences. I just included it because I'm surprised how few students bother to pen their sentiments about an instructor. I know writing is a challenge for many, but you should always take the opportunity to rail about a poor academic experience.


Jack "Hire Smart People" Welch

Some of my suggestions are up to you like reading the text before the lecture or securing face time by asking a baited question. Others are out of your control like a teacher's attitude or choice of textbook. The only option for the latter is to avoid their class altogether.

One last bit of advice. Ignore people that say,

"Grades don't matter."

Your academic performance is a measure of how much effort you are willing to put into a task. I've never worked for a company that didn't seek high academic achievement in applicants. You don't want to work for people who don't hire smart people. So next time you sign up for a class, follow these simple rules, and you too will be a stellar student.