Another Year and No Invite

Another year has passed and some things in my house are dramatically different while others are steadfastly the same. Our oldest, Aidan, is as tall as me. We recently dropped him off at boot camp for Sea Cadets at Fort Devens. William is in the grade that Aidan was when Willy was born. One thing which hasn’t changed in another year is that my wife, Christine, was, yet again, not invited to Taylor Swift’s epic Fourth of July party.

She and Aidan were fans stretching all the way back to 2008 with Love Story. Recently I asked each what they thought of Taytay, and this is what I got,

"I kind of don't care for her latest stuff," Aidan mused.

"Reputation sets a new low for self absorption," Christine noted.

Could it be? Did Taylor Swift lose two fans? Impossible. Admittedly, I hate when pop stars pour their soul into their music, and reveal their inner secrets. After Miley Cyrus twerked in Robin Thicke's crotch at the 2013 MTV Music Awards, the performance drew negative reactions for its alleged raunchiness, sexism, racism, slut-shaming, and cultural appropriation. In response Thicke's wife, Paula Patton, divorced Thicke, whose next album was dedicated to his estranged wife. It was entitled Paula and was filled with Thicke's feelings for his ex including the debuted song, Get Her Back, which contained the following lyrics,

All I wanna do
Is give you that thing, play you that song, you and your girlfriend sing
All I wanna do
Is get you back tonight

Apparently Paula didn't want "that thing" anymore because she didn't swoon over the tune and come running back to Thicke. The album got less traction than the floor in a Starbuck's restroom. Robin himself said about the album,

"In hindsight, the only thing I would have done differently was, I wouldn’t have promoted it or sold it. I would have given it away."

That might have led to a new low of embarrassment. The pop singer Demi Lovato is always singing about her private life including her struggles with mental illness. In her break up song, You Don’t Do It For Me Anymore, she sings

Now that I've learned all about you
A love just like ours wouldn't last I won't fall for your games
So don't hate me if I say
You don't do it for me anymore.

Most fans thought the lyrics were about ex Wilmer Valderamma, but Lovato confirmed that the song was about her "old self." Taylor Swift referred to her old self in Look What You Made Me Do, her Kanye West revenge song in which she recites,

I'm sorry, the old Taylor can't come to the phone right now.
Why?
Oh, 'cause she's dead!

Dead? What a way to milk the drama teat. We all miss the ole Taylor who wrote upbeat work out songs like Shake It Off instead of

I don't trust nobody and nobody trusts me
I'll be the actress starring in your bad dreams

The old Taylor was asked to collaborate on a song with Kanye West after he drunkenly snatched the microphone from her during her acceptance speech at the 2009 VMA while saying,

"Imma let you finish..." (we all know the rest)

In response to a possible collaboration, the old Taylor said something like,

"That's never gonna happen."

In 2015, Taylor agreed to play nice with Kanye and presented the Video Vanguard Award to the rapper, who announced he smoked pot to get through his acceptance speech, and that he plans to run for president in 2020, all while Taylor stood arm and arm with wife, Kim Kardashian. Shortly thereafter, Kanye wrote this lyric for Famous,

I feel like me and Taylor might still have sex
Why? I made that bitch famous (God damn)

Then Taylor's mother ratted out deejay David “Jackson” Mueller for supposedly grabbing her daughter's butt at a meet and greet when this picture was taken. Mueller's hand does appear to be on the singer's can, but actual contact is uncertain. In fact, the hand up Taylor's skirt might have been Mueller's girlfriend's who would seem to be in a better position than Mueller for a full on proctologic exam. Mueller was not a shock jock who bragged about the incident on air. Either way, he got summarily shit canned from the radio station, then sued Swift for $3 million. He lost, but not before Taylor's mother said,

"One of the things I think that stuck with me was that [Taylor] couldn't believe that after the incident, ...that she thanked him...It made me question why I taught her to be so polite in that moment."

I don't know how polite Taylor is, but I do know she said "ass" a record number of times in court. Her mother has got me worried because in 2013, I was photographed within a few inches of Taylor's ass. I was certain with the new found "MeToo" status, Taylor's mom would come for me as well. Here's the picture. I'm the guy on the boogie board in the water behind Taylor. I figure once her mother sees this picture, she's gonna call up Google and get me shit canned from my blogging gig.

It's sad for me to accept that my wife and son are no longer Swifties, but changes come even when you stand still. I wish she stuck to her guns and steered clear of Kanye and the whole Kardashian Klan. The unwritten rule in the entertainment industry is for artists never to criticize each other. When Miley Cyrus did her twerking in Robin's thick one, Cher broke the rule by saying the performance "just wasn't done well. She can't dance, her body looked like hell, the song wasn't great, one cheek was hanging out. And, chick, don't stick out your tongue if it's coated." All these things were true, but later the same day Cher rolled back her criticism indicating that she was "ashamed" of her comments.

Rappers apparently didn't get the memo since Nicky Manaj said of Cyrus's when she hosted the VMAs apparently in response to comments made by Cyrus in a newspaper article,

"And now back to this bitch who had a lot to say about me the other day in the press. Miley what's good."

Cyrus shot back,

"Hey, we're all in this industry. We all do interviews, and we all know how they manipulate shit. Nicky congradua-fucking-lations."

Then after taking credit for her fame, Kanye tried "to take down Taylor." All this infighting is ruining the end product. I'll tell you what Kanye West has really done. He made Taylor Swift write the worst songs of her life.

Come back, ole Taylor. Come back.